What is up guys? I’ve got the confidence, I’ve got a fantastic personality, I’m smart, I’m funny. I’m actually quite a catch. But guess what? You turn me down because I’m not skinny. What the fuck is that all about, anyway? I mean, I want to be a nurse and save the planet. What part about me, other than my weight, do you not find attractive? NOTHING, THAT’S WHAT!

There needs to be a serious shift in priorities. Our media constantly tells us what to wear, how to speak, what to listen to, how our houses should look, etc. Our media also tells us who is and is not acceptable to love and be attracted to. This is just plain bullshit. Before our world was taken over by the media, women were preferred to be “plump”, chubby. Women who were “well rounded” were appreciated. Every size was appreciated. and now, if you’re even slightly fluffy, you get fat jokes and turn downs. I’m not happy with this, not one bit.

and it’s not women. Women do not have this problem. We choose who we like based on the physical, yes, but our standards are not ridiculous. I mean, there are shallow women, but there are way fewer shallow women than man. This is a fact. Trust me. We’re so much more into your personality, not your weight. We appreciate the words that come out of your face, not the length of your dick.

I’m giving up on men. None of you have proven me wrong, yet. Unless I find someone in the near future who can prove me wrong, I’m giving up on my search. You guys aren’t worth it. At all. Maybe I should be a lesbian. Oh, by the way, women who become lesbians after being in straight relationships ARE doing it because of you. Men. Because you’re shallow and selfish. End of story.

It is 2:45 in the morning and what am I doing? I am uploading photos to Flickr. Photography is my crack and I am absolutely okay with that. My camera is my soul and I am more than happy to have it that way. I like that I feel like I have some talent that I don’t feel like I have to compete with. Drawing was always a competition, somehow. That’s mostly why I stopped. I didn’t like what it did to me and I didn’t like what I did to IT. Either way, this camera has made my creative world so much better. But could the price for a new lens go down just a tad? That would be great. Thanks.

I watched Julie & Julia, tonight. That movie made me feel so much better about life and I cannot explain how or why. The movie itself was wonderful, but there was something else that made me happy. Don’t ask me what, I have no idea. Maybe it was because Julia never said sorry for her mistakes. Especially on camera. Or maybe because she went after what she loved most and used it. But it also made me want to buy her giant cookbook and actually cook good, REAL food for once.

My strange domestic side is calling me….

That is all.

On nights like these, I tend to miss those long summer nights where dark would cease to exist until 9:00 at night, where the heat would stick to your skin and hold itself against you through the evening and into morning.

It is terribly cold. My skin has gone numb and I can’t feel my nose, toes, and fingertips. I told my old friend Gemma that I would gladly trade places with her, right now. She moved back to Australia a couple years ago. I miss her. But, right now, our Winter is her Summer. I wish I was there.

As you can see, this is my first blog. and I promise they will get better. As well as my page. I am an HTML junkie and will end up messing with this whole thing as soon as I get my own computer back. Right now I’m using a borrowed laptop that is without Photoshop and all my other files. So, I’ll have to deal with this layout, for now. Which is fine, I suppose.

Be well.